It all started with a ring.

Well, wedding proposals always start with a ring. Too weird of me to think otherwise.

From the start, I always knew that the wedding proposal (from Lex of course) was never a question of “Will it happen?” but rather an issue of “When will it be?”. Even before we were together we share the same sentiments with regards to dating and relationships. Be with someone who we really think is spouse material, not some random fling that can be changed any time. After we got together, random talks about marriage issues and how to go about it were always welcomed.

Essentially, we were really engaged. But we still kinda need the wedding proposal to mark the beginning of wedding plans. We also need the pre-proposal timeframe to sort out our personal endeavors (i.e. studies, career, enjoy remaining days of single blessedness, etc)

With that in mind, I would tell him time and time again that if ever he decides to propose, I will do the following:

1. Stop for a few seconds
2. Deliberate whether his proposal was acceptable based on my criteria (which were really easy to achieve, IMHO)
3. If not, say try again.
4. If passed:

a. Pause for a few more seconds.
b. Relish the moment.
c. Say ‘yes’

Good thing, He never questioned the algorithm or proposed any changes to it. Although he did made sarcastic comments about the three-months-salary engagement ring. But in my defense, I was misunderstood. I only said that there should be a time-frame when he’ll think that his salary (not necessarily 100%) will go to the ring. Because there should be the ritual of labor, right? Right.

It was some time in February (I think) when he contemplated on purchasing a new car. His second-hand Nissan Sentra was having more problems and owning it was more of a hassle than a luxury. Of course, there is always the issue of finances and not having enough savings for other things. When he asked for my opinion, I told him that it’ll be better for him to have a new car since the comfort and convenience might not translate to financial savings but at least he wouldn’t be so tired trying to do all his daily tasks. Thinking that a new car could serve as our first family car (his very words), I added that he should concentrate his financial efforts on the new car — not on an engagement ring (which I didn’t require to be too expensive in the first place). I even equated the car to a proposal so that he wouldn’t worry too much on how I’d take it. New car = engagement. That was the deal.

Fast forward to April. Despite the workload in the office, they were really gracious to approve my vacation leave so that I can attend Lex’s MA graduation. We were both relieved and happy that he finished his graduate studies considering the number of hurdles he went through to get there. I needed to go to the recognition rites even if it was a weekday.

After the ceremonies, Lex suggested we have lunch at some fine dining restaurant near UP. Since he was in a barong and I wore a fancy dress, I did not protest. No way would we drive to Techno Park, SM or Trinoma where all the undergraduates are. So we went straight to Zucchini’s — a super classy restaurant near A. Roces.

I really could not remember the exact sequence up to this point. I think somewhere in our conversations about his Master’s degree, his UP mentors, my work and how I should really go back after he just mentioned excitedly that he already bought my anniversary gift. He was really smiling and giddy which I translated to “I have an anniversary gift and you don’t. Ha!” (which is true… for shame!). Still excited about the gift, I asked repeatedly what it was. My mind stop guess when suddenly, a little box just appeared on the table. Still smiling, he opened the box and there it was…

A ring. Not a car, but a ring. THe ring.

And of course, I skipped number 3. =)

Nevertheless, I’m quite optimistic with the year ahead. 2009 was bittersweet (if not boring) and I couldn’t wait to see what’s in store for me this new year. Then again, even if monotony would still be included in my daily routine, I just hope more sweet memories will be associated with 2010.

Happy New Year everyone!

And as always, here is the token End-Of-Year meme.

What did you do in 2009 that you’d never done before?
- Be marooned in my own (well, technically my brother’s) home

Did you keep your New Years’ Resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
- I remember my promise to be more sober when driving… still working on it.

Did anyone close to you give birth?
- Yup =)

Did anyone close to you die?
- Sadly yes. my father’s younger sister and my mother’s older sister.

What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?
- Hmmm…. an inflatable bed. and about 10 or more life vests

What days from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory?
- The Laiya trip

What was your biggest achievement of the year?
- Finished one short course despite the “busy” schedule

What was your biggest failure?
- Having a serious hobby

Did you suffer illness or injury?
- Not really. Recent trips to the Doctor confirmed some health issues I have.

What was the best thing you bought for 2009?
- Wii and the new laptop

Where did most of your money go?
- Savings?

What did you get really, really, really excited about?
- Joie’s vacation and the Laiya trip

What song(s) will always remind you of 2009?
- No idea

Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder? Can’t tell
ii. thinner or fatter? Fatter?
iii. richer or poorer? Richer?

What do you wish you’d done more?
- Rest and outside work activities!

What do you wish you’d done less of?
- Worrying

What was your favorite TV program?
- Chuck!

What did you want and get
- An iPod Nano

What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
- 24, work, went to church, had dinner with family

What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
- an amphibious car

How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?
- same old same old

What kept you sane?
- Lex and …

What political issue stirred you the most?
- Ondoy, Pre-election news, Maguindanao

Who did you miss?
- Joie and maybe deeper conversations with random friends

Who was the best new person you met?
- Didn’t meet anyone new

Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009.
- Have a little faith. Worry less. Pray more.

What did you like the most about yourself this year?
- ???

What did you hate most about yourself this year?
- The somewhat uncontrollable mood swings. I still don’t know if it’s innately me or the imbalance thing.

Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
- ???

Was 2009 a good year for you?
- Nope. Generally speaking

What’s your most favorite moment of the year?
- Laiya trip

What’s your least favorite moment of the year?
- When Lex told me he has polyps in his gall bladder

Where were you when 2009 began?
- At home

Who were you with?
- Family

Where will you be when 2009 ends?
- At home

Who will you be with when 2010 ends?
- Family

Do you have a new year’s resolution for 2010?
- Nope. I’ll make them if I’m serious about keeping them

What was your favorite month of 2009?
- February, April, December

What was your favorite record from 2009?
- ???

Did you drink a lot of alcohol in 2009?
- Nope.

You did anything you are ashamed of this year?
- the little things I try to forget

What was your proudest moment of 2009?
- Nothing stands out

What was your most embarrassing moment of 2009?
- Nothing stands out

If you could go back in time to any moment of 2009 and change something, what would it be?
- Transfer the car to a much higher plane

What are your plans for 2010?
- Work hard. Earn much more.

How are you different now that the year has ended?
- I’m trying to achieve financial independence

What are your wishes for the new year?
- Health, success and happiness for me and my loved ones

But somehow, Christmas feels different than before. I guess the joy and excitement of Christmas wears off as you grow older. That, and a handful of thoughts lingering in my head for some time now.  Christmas and harsh reality will take a very long time to mix. It may end up like oil and water no matter how hard I try.

I did manage to complete the Simbang Gabi. A feat worth saying since I could not remember the last time I completed the nine days novena. The idea of being granted a wish after it all gives me a sense of hope.

I am very much grateful for family, friends and my special guy. My wish will always be for their good health, safety and success. Because that is what Christmas is for me. Being around the people I love and seeing their success and happiness despite the cruelty beyond the warm walls of home.

It’s sad I could not feel the Christmas spirit. Perhaps it’s the horrendous news in media nowadays. Not even the Pacquiao’s win and Penaflorida’s award boost my morale. In fact, I even feel sad that their achievements (expecially Penaflorida’s) has been shadowed by the gruesome news that followed their victories.

Eleksyon na kasi.

I think I’ll burst if I hear another unqualified person files his/her certificate of candidacy. Maybe every citizen is unqualified one way or another.

Ideally, one should look at competency and platform of the candidate during elections. Then again, our democracy is a mile away from reaching the ideal state. So what now?

Haaaaayy….

I never thought I could reach our home three days later.

Everyone knows the story. Typhoon Ondoy, although projeted to only be a small typhoon, destroyed the Greater Manila Area and other provinces. Unlike Milenyo, Ondoy packed itself with so much rain water that it made rivers out of roads and islands out of houses — big or small.

My brother’s house wasn’t spared. For two days, we took refuge on the second floor while the flood water entered the house. Transferring the car to a higher lot didn’t help at all. It was completely submerged in the flood and we could only watch from afar. For fear of being electrocuted, I switched off our main power. Food was another problem. We only had cooked food to last us a night and none of us didn’t dare to go downstairs and scavenge for food — not until we’re sure that the water will not rise again. Marooned in our brother’s home. It wasn’t a pretty sight.

What made me even more nervous was the fact that my whole family were separated the whole duration of the storm. Four little groups with little to no means for communication since the ladlines are dead and so are cellphone signals. Through sporadic text messages, I learned that my parents were stranded from Saturday till Sunday afternoon on a nearby mall. My sister had to stay on her officemate’s dorm and didn’t come home till Monday afternoon. The house in Antipolo was spared but the neighborhood also had flood water problems.

The days after the storm were no walk in the park either. Clean-up, repairs, search and rescue operations, relief operations, friend roll call, reporting back to work, opportunistic politicians, blamming games — not to mention the self-inflicted paranoia that rendered me paralyzed even with just a slight rain shower. Good thing we can still see the silver lining — bayanihan, out pouring donations, volunteerism, stories of bravery. These are new blog posts all together. I could even make a book out of it. But now is not the time. All I could think of is how we can all bounce back and fast.

And now another storm threatens the country with much more danger than Ondoy. Pepeng is now named a supertyphoon and experts say it could even cause more damage to the country. This time will be different. This time, we’re (semi)prepared. I took a whole day leave so that we can do the final clean-up and prepare my brother’s house for Pepeng and retreat to our home in Antipolo. It’s tough to leave my work hanging but I don’t want to be separated with my family again. I bought food and supplies that could hopefully last us until the storm ends. The whole family is staying in the mothership — cars parked safely in the garage. This time, we’re ready.

Then again, who would have thought two storms will hit the country in such a short time. Oh dear Lord, please save us from another devastation.

=========

UPDATE (October 3, morning): News say Pepeng changed its course and it will no longer affect Southern Luzon. I just hope that Northern Luzon will not experience too much damage.

UPDATE (October 4): Greater Manila Area is spared. Pepeng damaged Northern Luzon — killing 15 when it left. When will things go back to “normal”?

UPDATE (October 10): Because of another storm Pepeng u-turned to Ilocos. Death toll is above 150 now.

That’s about 2 posts in one month. If it takes roughly an hour to do a decent post (seriously, that’s how long I stare at the screen to write a decent post), where did the rest of the 21,780 hours of the past months go?

Oh yeah, I remember — work. And before that, school.

Writing is supposed to be one of my escape hobbies. I figured I needed a lot of those considering I haven’t mastered the art of fusing daily tasks and leisure. I didn’t consider in the exhaustion factor. Working/studying the whole day doesn’t leave an ounce of stable mind work to even write. What I end up doing is another 1-2 hour mindless internet session coupled with new episodes of whatever series I’m into at the moment. I’ll pass out on bed and wake up to another task-filled day ahead. The vicious cycle continues.

I really do wish I could find the time and the energy to enjoy life outside work or whatever task I have. Although life’s survival consists of the I-had-to-do’s of the universe but I do believe that sustainance and meaning would come from I-want-slash-like-slash-love-to-do’s.  Loving what you do may not actually be possible for everyone… including me, but striking a balance would also bring that feeling of fulfillment and self-assurance…

… and of course the freedom from stress or any physical  complications.

While my officemates are excited with their upcoming vacation (may it be Bohol, Palawan or maybe Boracay), I was planning a weekend or two of having to lounge around at home and/or the mall with my Dearest or my friends. Oh, and yeah, my friends and I were planning to go to EK to. A childhood wish that was postponed ever since we last went there.

Due to work schedules, we had to postpone the EK trip to another date. No bitterness here, as it didn’t seem right to go to Laguna with an empty car seat. Happiness minus one (or two) was never an option for us in the first place.

Bitterness came when I was issued a ticket for an honest mistake.

Instead of EK, we opted to go to Mall of Asia instead. It has been a long time since I set foot on the monumental shopping grounds and Pam and Michelle had never been there since it first opened. I offered the car and my driving services so that we can get there early. “EDSA would be free and smooth-sailing on Saturdays,” I thought. So I turned right to Ortigas from Libis and managed to turn left to EDSA while the light was still green…

However, I was pulled over by two MMDA officers saying that I entered the Bus lane.

Never mind the fact that the signs were so confusing it was almost impossible to see if the road is still open or fenced shut. I still entered the wrong lane.

It also didn’t matter that he private vehicle lane and the Bus lane will merge a few meters away PLUS there are no buses in sight. I still entered the wrong lane.

Besides, according to the MMDA, lane segregation is there to prevent road accidents. If you ask me, I’d rather they have the roads segregated from the raging motorcycles.

I did promise to become a law-abiding citizen especially way back in Grade school/Highschool when we recite the “Panatang Makabayan” every week of our lives. And I don’t have any problems with the MMDA officers, either. Save for the fact that they gave me the ticket, they were easy to talk to and were kind enough to give us directions on not to be caught anymore.

What bugs me are the traffic rules I supposedly broke. It is an inch away from being stupid and reading their PSAs are even more dangerous than actually entertaining a call on your cellphone. Driving is enough chore and attention-grabbing as it is. Also, this “rule” might not apply a year from now. And if it does, I just end up being a victim of circumstance and a P500 ticket.

Don’t get me wrong, I’ll still pay the fine. I guess I should avoid EDSA for now.

I was only a year old when EDSA 1 happened and my memories of her presidency were the numerous brown-outs that taught me to play outside even after the moon shines over my head. I wouldn’t know if her presidency was the best thing that happened to our country — history will be the judge of that. What I’ll miss about her is her (and her husband’s) capability to just draw people closer, effortlessly (in 2 different ways, of course). I remember that high school field trip in Tarlac when I caught myself just staring at Ninoy and Cory’s wedding portrait for a good minute or two.

Charisma is truly a rare gift which I also pray for, myself. Although, if it is The Almighty’s will to bestow it to someone else, I just hope that whoever has it would use it for the good of the many.

Rest in Peace, Mrs. Aquino.

Rest in peace, Miss Tara Santelices. May you finally have rest in the arms of our Lord.

A few months back, I was struggling to access my wordpress dashboard so I could write down all the interesting topics in my head. After that domain transfer drama I just had, I seemed to have lost all thoughts completely. I tried to piece them together but the details were lacking and I couldn’t remember how I’ve constructed them back then.

I really wish I could have a recorder/transcriber for brain impulses. Things would be much easier with them.

While tracing back my thoughts for a better entry, I took the liberty of changing the site layout again. WPUnlimited is super nice and flexible with all the customization tools (SEO included) but I just didn’t have the time to improvise a design other than the bare white and violet. With the new Illacrimo theme and flickrRSS plugin plus flickr badge, SBS looks more sleek and organize.

The new design may not drive the writer’s block away but it did bring pleasing aesthetics. As it should, whenever you’re redecorating your home… or on this case, your personal soapbox. =)